Monday, May 20, 2013

The Day I Washed My Hands 5 Thousand Times

I try not to share a lot of teaching-related stories on this blog because I try to respect the privacy of my school and its patrons.

But today's events are too good not to share.

Let me preface this story by saying that Monday is a kindergarten day for me, so all of the things you are about to read came from the mouths of 5-6 year olds. Furthermore, it is my last class of the year with them, so I decided to take them on a nature scavenger hunt by our school's pond.

During the first class, I realize that children have the uncanny ability to lose their stuff and not even notice. After one class, I found a handful of my class's pencils in the grass and in the hallway. I have no idea how the kids who dropped them continued to do their work outside because no one ever came to me in a panic about a missing pencil. Sigh.

On to my stories.

One of my little friends thinks {knows?} he is some serious man-candy. We were taking a bathroom break. I had my kiddos lined up on the wall to wait for the next available stall, and a 3rd grade girl exited her classroom. My little friend waved at her. I thought it was unusual for a kindergartener to wave to a 3rd grader, so I asked him, "Who were you waving at?" He clarified by telling me the girl's name. I said, "Huh. I didn't know you and ------ were friends." My little friend just shrugged, popped his collar, and said casually, "All the girls want me."

A few seconds later, I hear a commotion from the boys' bathroom -- which is never a good sign -- so I tell them to finish their biznass ASAP. Two or three little boys come out of the bathroom laughing. In my heart of hearts, I know it's best not to ask, but the nosy gal in me just can't resist. So I say, "What's so funny?" One of them tells me that another one just peed on a pencil that was floating in the toilet. I must have given him a wary look because he said, "It's target practice, Mrs. K!"

If you're aware of the life of a teacher, you know that it's pretty much a whirlwind from 7:30 am to about 4 pm. Naturally, I forgot about both of these incidents until much later.

Fast forward to my last class of the day. I'm settling an argument about whose-spot-was-whose in the hallway, and one of my little guys keeps tapping my arm and saying, "Here, Mrs. K." over and over. {If you've seen the annoying Stewie-from-Family-Guy commercial with him saying "Mom" repeatedly then you now have a better understanding of my situation.} I'm distracted by trying to break up this hallway squabble, so I absent-mindedly hold out my hand. Little Dude puts something wet in it and walks away. I glance at my hand, notice it's just a pencil, and go back to my role as hallway referee.

Hold up.

Wet pencil?!?!

I cautiously call out, "Heeeeyyy there... where'd ya get this pencil?"

He looks up at me, wide-eyed, and says innocently, "In the bathroom. It was floating in the toilet."

Me: "Whhhyyyy did you reach in the toilet for a pencil?!"

Him: "You always tell us not to waste supplies."

As I stand there, with my hand soaking from the pee pencil, I realize I've just been schooled -- unknowingly -- by a 5 year old. Touche, kid. You win.

And that, folks, is why I have hard abs -- from all the laughing -- but am sorta counting down until summer break.



Sunday, May 19, 2013

Jon's Birfday and The Office

Jon's birthday came and went. He's another year older {than me} and another year smarter {not than me}. haha. ;) We went to dinner with some friends to celebrate:

Things have been fairly uneventful in our lives, so there's not a lot to write about {Do I say that in every post now? I feel like I do}. This explains why there's a lack of posts... I definitely have lots of hilarious things that happen to me with the kiddos at school, but I'm saving all of those stories for my book. ;)

Let's see... what is something humorous that I can share with you? Ah, here is something that might make you smile:

My school is wonderful, but I'll be honest: we have a roach problem. Thus, this text message one day:
I'm thankful he humors me when I need him to.
As the science teacher, everyone automatically thinks I am the "Official Bug Killer." I can do (and have done) it, but it's def not my favorite part of the job. I'm thinking I should add this new talent to my resume, though. hah.

Speaking of school, Teacher Appreciation Week was May 6 - 10. Our PTO and other volunteers did an amazing job at making us feel appreciated! I walked in on Monday morning to see this sign on my door...

Some of the kids signed it with encouraging words and comments about how "science rocks." :)

 ...and it only got better from there. :)

My summer "break" officially starts on June 6 at about 3:30 pm. I absolutely cannot believe that school is winding down already. It literally seems like just yesterday, I was nervously thinking about how this first year back was going to go. I feel like I've been a first year teacher three separate times because I've never gotten to teach the same thing twice in a row. But I'm happy to say that I signed my contract for next year, and I will be in the exact same teaching position for the 2013-2014 year, so... yippee!!!

*Picture me giving you an ear-to-ear grin and a thumb-up gesture.*

It's funny because, at this time last year, I was starting to doubt that God even wanted me to be a teacher. I know that sitting out a year really isn't that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things, but it felt like a lot at the time. I was just getting started with my career, and then I had to go back to substituting? Ugh. But if I had to go back and do it all again, I would gladly wait a whole year again. I feel like God picked out this school and this position especially for me, and I know it fits our lives perfectly.

Speaking of God, I've been reading this amazing devotional lately. My Meme got me hooked on it. It's called Jesus Calling by Sarah Young.
Image from Amazon.

Lately, it's been talking about just trusting God's plans instead of trying to over-plan for myself. Man, I tell ya: I think Sarah wrote this book especially for me. If you know me, you know I am the queen of schedules and plans. {I'm working on my Queen of the World title, but this one will have to work for now, I guess.} It was an eye-opener for me to realize that my over-planning might be a slap in face to God. It's not an easy task for me to let go of it all, but I'm workin' on it.

We watched the finale episode of The Office this week. I normally do not get emotionally attached to TV shows, but The Office was near and dear to my heart. I started watching it after Jon and I started dating because it was one of his favorite shows. I hated it with a passion, so, to torture me, he sat me down on the couch of his Stillwater apartment and made me watch seasons 1-5. I slowly started liking the show but didn't admit it until a couple years later! lol. Plus, we always equate good ol' Jim and Pam to us because they started out as friends and then became family, just like we did. :)

Goodbye, favorite show. *sniff, sniff* | Source
Sorry that this post isn't as witty as I normally try to be. I assume I will have lots of funny stories this summer because of all the traveling I'll be doing... I'll keep ya updated.