Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Dear Future Us

Get Botox. 

OK, I'll explain a little more. 

See, Jon's best friend introduced me to this iPhone app called Oldify.  It's an application that takes pictures of you or people you know and turns them into old people by giving them sunspots, wrinkles, etc. 

Jon's best friend kindly sent me pictures of what Jon and I will look like when we're, oh, about 80, and we were hawt stuff, lemme tell ya. 

I was bored and decided to download the app for myself. I was cracking myself up, so I thought I'd share my results with you.

Here is my husband now. I don't know why I picked this picture to transform...just go with it.


Here is my husband, had we decided to get married in 2070.


Yum.

I took a picture of myself in the car (Jon was driving; don't freak out). So here I am today.


And here I am in the future.


Jon kindly said, "You don't age that much. I look like I got beaten with a stick." 

Oh, honey. It warms my heart that even after 50 years together, you still think I'm lovely. haha. 

The app also has a video feature! You can place markers where your eyes and mouth are, and the app will make you "blink" and "yawn." They'll record it in about a 15 second video and you can send it to others, e-mail it to yourself, or post it on your social networking sites. 

It's a .mov file, so I have no idea how to get it off my e-mail and attach it to this blog post. :( Too bad...it's funny! 

If you know how, please comment below so that I can share my hilarity with you. :) For now, just enjoy the still-life versions of my handsome hubs and myself.


Thursday, April 19, 2012

Brilliant Refrigerator Idea

I absolutely cannot take credit for this idea; I found it on Pinterest (duh), but you can find the original source here. 

This is going to sound totally weird, but: as much as I love clean and organized things, I'm not really a huge fan of cleaning.

But, I mean, really, who loves to clean?


I'm sure you read that we got a new refrigerator delivered to our house last week. (If you didn't read that, where have you been?! Why have you not been keeping up diligently with our blog?! :)



I am determined to keep it looking this shiny and new for as long as possible...all the while, spending the least amount of energy and time as possible.

I'm about to share something gross with you. Ready?


Ew. Just...ew. In case you're wondering, that glob of sticky jelly is resting inside our refrigerator door (yes, present tense. That's right: I took the picture and closed the door again!), grossing me out. (This is probably a good reason why Jon and I should not have children: I get grossed out by random globs of grape jelly that may or may not have been created by me. Don't judge.)

Since I'm doing the house-wife/tutor/sub thing while I'm looking for my dream classroom any classroom of my own, I'm home a lot. That means I can clean whenever I want to (which is never, but who's counting?).

But, thanks to a month-long subbing job back in February, I found out just hard it is to work full time and cook and clean the way I'd like to for Jon. I'm going to be optimistic and say that God has a teaching job lined up for me next year, so I'm looking for ways to make my evening job a little easier.

I stumbled onto this article on Pinterest, which suggests lining your refrigerator with that self-sticking plastic wrap before putting anything inside. Now when we I spill things, I can just pull the plastic wrap up and put a new sheet down... viola! No scrubbing or icky sponge required!

Brilliant, I tell you!

So I totally did it, starting with the doors.


The store I went to only had this Christmas-themed sticky wrap available, but I figured it's OK to have Christmas in our 'fridge year round.

I was pleased with how it turned out -- even though it looks a teensy bit weird -- so I did the rest of shelves, too.








I covered both the refrigerator and freezer shelves and both doors with this sticky wrap. I'm almost excited for the first spill to occur...then I can prove what a great idea this is by "cleaning" it in 5 seconds flat! :)

Do you have a good cleaning tip for me?



Sunday, April 15, 2012

Disaster and a Half

What a busy week!

Wednesday was when the folks from Texas Appliance delivered our new, stainless steel dishwasher and refrigerator. Behold:

Fancy new dishwasher

Fancy new 'fridge

We were so pumped to get these! We've never had new appliances and certainly never had anything stainless steel. Our appliances in the apartment work fine, but the dishwasher is mega-loud. We seriously only do dishes when we're about to leave the apartment or when we're about to go to bed and shut our bedroom door -- it's that loud. So, of course, when we looked for a new dishwasher, we were adamant about getting one that's quiet.

After the delivery man installed both appliances, he turned on the dishwasher to let me hear it. Um...there was pretty much nothing to hear. It. Was. AWESOME.

Unfortunately, the delivery man put a dent in our right 'fridge door when he was bringing it over the threshold, but he promised to bring a new door on Friday.

On Wednesday evening, when I was browsing Craigslist for lawn equipment and a corner shelf, I ran across this glider for sale in the area:


The price was much cheaper than an elliptical, and this thing folds up so it can fit in a closet -- perfect for the house that doesn't have an entire room dedicated to workout equipment. I know that gliders don't provide much resistance in the way of working out, but at least it was something that could provide me with cardio while I simultaneously stuff goldfish in my mouth watch TV, and the lady in the picture looks like she's having a good time working out, so I decided to e-mail the seller.

Look at that smile! Cardio is fun! ...Big fat liar.
I immediately got a reply that the glider was still available, and he could meet me on Friday to make the sale. I've never purchased anything off Craigslist before -- Craigslist killer, anyone?? -- but I figured that meeting him in broad daylight in front of a store couldn't be that bad.

That was on Wednesday night. By Friday morning, I was having second thoughts.



Thank goodness for the Find My Friends app on iPhone -- I made sure Jon was tracking me during every second of this little meeting! (Note: My family spent about an hour in the parking lot of a mall with this app on Thursday night, trying to track my mom's dropped cell phone! We probably should've recorded the whole scenario...or maybe I should make a blog post about it. Anyway, this app is a gem, and you'll be happy to know that my mom now has her iPhone back.)

The glider ended up being too big to fit in my little car -- dang it, Toyota! -- so the guy offered to drop it off at our house, "if I was comfortable with that." Well, considering that Jon was at work and we had no access to any bigger vehicles at the moment, I decided I'd either better get comfy with the idea of this man coming to my house or else I wouldn't be purchasing any fancy new workout equipment.

So I led the guy to our new house. I am slightly embarrassed to say that I called Jon to freak out a little on the way, saying he'd better be watching my blinking blue dot on the iPhone's GPS map the entire time. 

I kept all the doors of the house locked and only opened the garage. He offered to tow the thing into whichever room I wanted, but I said no, thank you, if you can just lay it right there in the garage, I'll throw the money at you, lock the doors, and you can be on your merry way.

OK, so I only said the first portion about laying it in the garage. But I was thinking the rest.

You'll be glad to know I made it out of the situation safely, with the glider as our newest possession.

Literally double-checked every door and made sure the garage was firmly closed as I watched him leave through the window. It's also possible that I stayed at the window for an extra 10 minutes, in case he decided to come back to the house, wielding a chainsaw or ax.
With that done, I set to work on painting the master bathroom.

The master bathroom is the last room of the house left to paint, and our move in date is less than 2 weeks away, so I figured I'd better get crackin'.

The previous owners painted the entire master bathroom a poopy, brown color, so we have to paint the ceiling and the walls.

I'd never painted a ceiling before.

I'm not the neatest painter to begin with.

I'm sure you can see where this is leading.

An hour later, it looked like a mini, F3 tornado had come through our master bathroom. There was paint everywhere. It had leaked through the drop cloths and was on the tile. Our bathtub was now the same color as the ceiling. I looked like a crazed football fan who painted up to display school spirit (if the school's color was "Oak Cake"). Oh, yeah, I also had paint IN MY EYE! Yup. I was wearing my contacts, and they have been bothering me since July, since the crazy new eye doctor I went to down here gave me a new brand of contacts (despite my insistence that I loved my old brand) and refused to let me exchange them (despite all my vision problems since then). So my eyes are always a little irritable when they're sans-glasses. However, all of a sudden, I got a burning sensation in my right eye. Looked in the mirror, and...yup. There was "Oak Cake," sittin' pretty on my contact lens. Cool. (I donned lawn mowing goggles during the rest of my ceiling-painting adventure, in case you're wondering.)

After I finished the first coat and the trim, I instinctively looked in the mirror to congratulate myself on a job well done.

I looked like Bride of Frankenstein. No, really. I had a streak of white-ish "Oak Cake" going down one side of my head.

Source

Hawt.

It was then that I decided to tweet again.



I was fed up and didn't want to wait on the refrigerator installation man, so I decided to go back to the apartment for lunch; surely, that would make him come more quickly.

I had just finished lunch when he called, saying he was already at the house, so I raced back to let him in. I finished the second coat of paint on the ceiling (much less messy this time, thankyouverymuch), and came home for the day.

On Saturday, Jon and I spent time at the house all day again. He's trying to finish the plumbing and electrical on the master bath, and I'm trying to avoid painting again at all costs. :) So I spent most of the day packing things at the apartment, lugging them to the house, and unpacking them. Jon worked on the bathroom and the garage; he wanted to put an epoxy sealant on the garage floor. He finished it late Saturday night, and it looks good! (Sorry, no picture.)

We forgot about it being race weekend at Texas Motor Speedway, so I got stuck in traffic coming back to the apartment. 3 of the 4 entrances to our apartment are blocked by cops, and they make certain roads into one-ways so as to better control the traffic. I had to park on the side of the highway and politely ask the cop to move his cones and let me back to my apartment. Sigh.

This morning, we watched Megamind on Netflix. It was so funny! We recommend it. :)

Afterwards, we decided to make an impromptu trip to Ikea. (If you don't remember our first trip to Ikea, you can refresh your memory by reading this blog post.) We'd had our eye on a certain entertainment center since our first trip but just hadn't gotten around to getting over there again to purchase it.

We were slightly more prepared for Ikea this time around; I think I went in with the mentality of a Shopping Warrior, and that worked out quite well.

We had a hilarious moment when we first walked in: a family with an older lady toting a walker decided it was a good idea to board the escalator, despite the fact that the older woman did not seem to be able to stand on her own...and despite the fact that there was an elevator about 3 feet behind the escalator, clearly marked. A hippie couple got on the escalator after them, and we boarded after the hippies. The older woman's family couldn't carry her quite like they'd anticipated, so a crowd formed quickly at the top of the escalator. The hippies calmly stepped onto the unloading platform -- right up in Older Lady's grille, might I add -- and just stood, not leaving any room for Jesus. Jon and I are frantically trying to step backwards, one stair at a time, until we almost land on Little Girl's toes. We're finally forced to get off the escalator, and we become friends with the hippies, as we cannot leave any room for Jesus, either. Just as I was about to strike up a conversation with Hippie Girl about her interesting sweatshirt, the people-clog disburses, as Older Lady's family finally picked her up and scooted her to the side.

See? This is our life. Really. I can't make this up.

We found the entertainment center pretty quickly. Ain't she a beaut (said in my best hick-accent)?

Good news: you could actually buy this on Craigslist for $50...any takers??

lol. Kidding. This is our newest addition:
Source

Yippee!! I L-O-V-E it. No, I looooovvveeeee it!! *squeal*

Our current TV stand is something Jon picked up at a dumpster while he was in college (yeah. We're those people) and has black Sharpie on each end (yeah. We're those people, too), courtesy of Christmas 2011. Our current media stand is a $20 puny bookcase from Walmart that looks like a cockroach could tip it over (not that we have any!). So yeah, I'm a little excited about this fancy new entertainment center! :)

By the way, the actual purchasing process at Ikea was cray-cray. We Jon hauled a flatbed around the basement of Ikea, weaving back and forth through the aisles and other shoppers, in a strange scavenger-hunt for our future furniture. He loaded all of it himself and pushed our cart -- which, of course, veered to the left at every opportunity -- to the check out center. I'd also found some vases and fake flowers at a good price for the mantle and various other places in the house, so I was hauling those in the trademark, yellow, Ikea bag.

The guy is ringing up our purchases, starting with my yellow bag full of items, and he starts sliding the items down to me. He tells me there is packing paper beneath the register if I want to wrap them for extra protection. Hmm. OK.

I start wrapping the 5 vases and 6 fake flowers when it occurs to me: he's not handing me a shopping bag in which to pack them. I tentatively ask him if he has a bag I can use to carry our smaller items. He tells me that he has a blue shopping bag that I'm welcome to purchase for $0.59. ...Say what now?! You want me to purchase my shopping bag when I just spent my future children's college fund at your store?! I said no thank you, and I stuffed them all into my arms tightly. We looked ridiculous -- with me juggling glass vases and Jon zig-zagging down the parking lot -- but we made it in one piece!

We took it to the house and unloaded all the pieces. Jon wanted to work on installing some new light fixtures we bought for the bathrooms, so I decided I would unpack the small cabinet (where the TV is sitting in the picture above) and get started on putting it together. I tend to be impatient with things like that; I'm eager to start decorating, so I think that I can put this thing together by myself.

I'd heard that Ikea instruction booklets were easy to read: there are no words. They supposedly do this because the stores are in so many countries, and it's easier just to print everything in pictures so there's no need to translate.

My first warning should have been this page,

Source

which explicitly crosses out the one-person option and tells you to use the buddy system when putting together their furniture.

Ignoring the picture, I start flipping through the manual. There's like, 50 pages and about 5 times as many parts.

So I closed the box back up and told Jon I was ready to go back to the apartment. :) I'll he'll save that for another day.

Sheesh. I really am a Disaster and a Half. :)


Monday, April 9, 2012

Jon's birthday, Easter, and other things

We already know that I'm bad about forgetting to take pictures of important things (why else would I have listed "take more pictures" as a New Year's resolution?), so you'll have really have to bear with me on the quality of the photos in this post... Beggars can't be choosers. ;)

Jon and I are almost finished painting the house. We lack the master bathroom and half of the master bedroom and we are D-O-N-E! Phew. I cannot tell you how happy I am to say that. I enjoyed painting for, oh...the first two walls of the living room (the first room I painted), and then I was OVER IT. So you can imagine what painting our entire house has been like for me. lol. Luckily, we've had some great painting help from my dad and J's mom, and that has eased a lot of my pain in this endeavor.

I feel like we started this journey so long ago. Yesterday marked the 3-week mark since we first bought the paint, so I guess we are taking our sweet time on it. I've gotten a lot more subbing and tutoring jobs than we anticipated, which is great, but that takes away all the weekday painting I'd planned to do. But I guess that's yet another reason why we're glad we have such a long time frame to get everything ready before we have to move in. 

Speaking of moving in: we finally set a date. We now officially only have TWO weekends left until it's moving day.


Umm...what?! I mean, when we bought the house, it never occurred to me that I would need to pack up all our crap belongings again. (Did I mention I hate packing? Because. I. DO.) So after I finish painting those two rooms, I suppose I'll start hauling stuff over. Anything that can fit in my car and we don't use on a weekly basis is fair game...

While I've been painting and doing yard work, Jon has been helping with the yard work and working on our master bath renovation. When we bought the house, the master bath only had one sink. We know we're fortunate to have any sinks at all, but the master bathroom in our apartment has two sinks, and we LOVE them. It's not such a huge deal when I don't have to teach, but when I do, Jon and I sometimes have to get ready at the same time in the morning.  Fighting for sink space and mirror time  at the new house (or one of us being booted to the guest bathroom) did not seem fun to me, so I asked J if he would put in another sink. He, like me, is a bit of an over-achiever, and he's taken to restyling the entire vanity and sink area. He bought custom cabinets (to give us more storage! Yay!), a granite counter top, vessel sinks, and fancy, tall faucets to go with the vessel sinks. The set-up will look pretty similar to this:

Source

He's split the one water source into two (to accommodate two sinks) and provided an extra outlet, as well. I'm lucky to have married a little handy man. :) We'd like to time it to where I get finished painting as he gets finished with the rest of the bathroom...because after that, we're ready to start moving stuff in!

We went last week to pick out a 'fridge and dishwasher (both stainless steel...whoo!), and they're getting delivered this coming Wednesday. Everything is falling into place. :)

Friday was J's birthday. I decided to make him a cake:

For the record, I didn't know that the gel icing would fill in the spots to make yucky-looking p's. Obviously, culinary school is not in my future.

I've rotated that pic a million times and it still does not want to save properly, so just rotate your computer screen (or your neck) to view it correctly. ;)

I chose chocolate cake (J's favorite cake), whipped chocolate icing for all over, and red gel icing to write with (red =  his favorite color). Only...when I finished, it looked more like a meatloaf with ketchup on it. *wah-wah-waaahhhh* (That was the pitiful music chord that indicates something went wrong, in case you didn't catch that.) ...It worked out fine, though, because I think J was actually more excited to think that it was meatloaf with a ketchup design! haha. He'd really rather have meat and potatoes instead of sweets, so maybe I should've saved the faux-meatloaf in favor of a real one... Live and learn.

We went to dinner at our favorite Mexican restaurant in the area. I mentioned taking a picture while we were eating, but we were too busy stuffing our faces with nacho-y goodness to pause and snap a pic. And, of course, we forgot to snap one before we left the restaurant, as we took a little post-dinner stroll, OR as we watched a movie on the couch...plenty of photo ops, and we missed 'em all. Whoops.

Yesterday was Easter, and we spent it here with my mother- and father-in-love and the rest of the K family. We managed to snap a picture in the car in the parking lot outside our apartment at the end of the night. It's a bad quality picture, and I have to admit we don't look like super-models, but...whatev. This is an attempt to keep my picture resolution, dang it!

Please ignore the hair frizz. It rained all day and I used only a dab of hair spray. It's my own fault, but ignore it, anyway, please.

I have also tried editing THAT picture a million times to make it rotate 90 degrees to the left, but...to no avail. It refuses to save in an upright position. (Sometimes I think my computer and/or the software I use is a teenage girl... it can be moody.) So use the same head-or-computer-tilting technique from earlier to view the pic above. ;)

Let it be known that I can now curl my hair with a curling iron in about 15-20 minutes flat. I'm still not the Hair Whisperer, but I'm no longer a Hair Idiot, either. :)

Well, I'm going to down another cup of coffee, and it's off to paint, I go! Our wonderful, timed-coffee maker made a boo-boo last night. I unplugged it to plug in the mixer for J's birthday cake on Friday, and didn't realize that the coffee maker didn't save our settings. So when Jon turned it on last night to start brewing at 7 am this morning, the coffee maker thought it would be hilarious to start brewing around 1 am, instead. My nose loves coffee, so by 2 am, when the house was filled with the scent of my precious Folger's, I was WIDE AWAKE and could not sleep again until after 5 am. Ugh. So I'm sure you can understand why I need another cup of my nectar before I head off to make a mess finish the bedroom paint. :)